Victory
by Paradoxalpoised
Summary: [Warning: Swan Queen & Red Queen] Regina never really thought she could have a shot at happiness, with her son, with Emma, the three of them a family. Love also comes in unexpected ways, it can't be boxed, or reined. Love is always free, whether we want it or not, whether we comprehend it or not. It is time for Regina to come to terms with the love in her heart.
1. Chapter 1

**Synopsis:** Regina never really thought she could have a shot at happiness, with her son, with Emma, the three of them a family. Love also comes in unexpected ways, it can't be boxed, or reined. Love is always free, whether we want it or not, whether we comprehend it or not. It is time for Regina to come to terms with the love in her heart.

**Setting:** Events in this story are situated in Storybrooke post Nerverland (3x09), established Swan Queen and AU from there.

**Rating & Warning:** The story is rated M for violent, sexual and altogether adult content. Please be advised that triggers and events of traumatic natures will be present throughout the story.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, movies, books, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work, and the characters, settings, and events thereof, are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for-profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context, and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

"_And now we've grown up orphans I'd never knew their names  
We don't belong to no one that's a shame  
But you could hide beside me maybe for a while  
And I won't tell no one your name  
And I won't tell 'em your name"_

I Won't Tell No One Your Name- **The Goo Goo Dolls**, _A Boy Named Goo_.

###

Regina has laid out her clothes for the day on the meridian chaise. She's wearing a black lacy bra, black sheer cotton with lace trim panties and garter belt. She's propped a leg on the chair as she runs her stocking up her calf and thigh. Hoses are not her thing, she doesn't specifically enjoy being tucked in and they're of the utmost inefficiency. The morning light catches warmly on the white cotton sheet hugging the form of the naked woman in her bed. A smile dances, Emma is awake.

"I love watching you get ready in the morning."

Regina rolls her eyes, Emma makes her shy. It annoys her. Emma finds it sweet and frankly, sweet really isn't what she aims for.

"I didn't mean to wake you. I wanted to get an early start today."

Yet the shyness gets to her, it always does. Being shy and sweet in Emma's eyes means she's being human. She's doing something right when Emma's smile is genuine as it is for her now. Emma's turned up lips say I love you like nothing else. Now that she's tasted that, she won't relinquish any of it. Shyness be damned.

"I want to pick up Henry and spend a moment with him before he goes to your parents for the night."

"You're seeing Ruby tonight."

"Yes, as planned." Regina switches to the other leg.

"She's spending a lot of time with you." Emma is still smiling. The one from Emma's True Love heart which has worlds of kindness and promises of lifetimes of happiness genetically encoded in it.

"Miss Lucas is making very satisfactory progress with her situation, I am… glad that I can be of help."

"She can't stop raving about you." She chuckles gently this time. She knows what game they're playing at now. Emma is indulging her. "I think she might have a crush on you."

She considers her options quickly. She could deny it; she wants to but there is the small detail of the lively truth scanner she hates to lie to. Emma knows anyway.

Ruby is attracted to her. She's attracted to Ruby. She chose red stilettos today.

Her work with the girl is paying off. Ruby is older than Emma, but she's the girl to her. The she-wolf, the girl who helped Snow, the girl who ate her boyfriend, the girl who killed her own mother.

The girl she made a red cloak for, once upon a time.

She's made her a girl, here in Storybrooke too. Maybe it was so she could call her a girl. Possibly. A woman girl in perpetual riot.

Ruby's control of Red is growing rapidly, and with it, the closeness she's found herself referring to as friendship. Except friendship doesn't make you blush at the sight of a friend's musculature and taut figure. Friendship doesn't include the fierce desire she sometimes catches in Ruby's eyes. The kind that makes her feel a magnetic pull she had been certain could only emanate from Emma.

But what does she know? Friendship is not something she excels at. She's never quite gotten the hang of it, what with her friends betraying her, getting in her way or spoiling her fun. She's certainly never had a friend like Ruby. She's had pawns. She's even had playthings of her kind. Never a lover.

"We've grown closer." Regina lets her second leg on the floor, her feet in perfect sixth, beside her red stilettos. "I am her mentor of sorts, it's not that unexpected."

"She doesn't look at you like you're a mentor, Regina." Emma's tone is not angry. She sounds concerned, wary. That's not good at all. She's scared, for her, for them. Emma doesn't worry for herself. The woman makes an irritating point to forget herself first thing in the morning, every day of her life.

"Emma," Regina looks for Emma's gaze and holds it. She says it again, like she has done a hundred times. Like she will do again until it's enough. Although she suspects it very well may never be. "I am with you, I have chosen you, you have my heart." There is surprise in Emma's eyes. That's not unexpected; there always is.

How she loathes that surprise. Villainous, violently unwanted, cloyingly treacherous, murderous surprise in those kind, soft, breathtakingly beautiful, beautiful eyes, she wishes she could erase with a swirl of her hand. She would gladly pay the price for that. The ugly, innocent and authentic surprise Emma has that she's being loved at all, not that Regina is the one loving her. Although once in awhile, there is that, too.

Regina says it at the most unpredictable times, the most boring times, the most inappropriate times, in all sorts of forms and ways. She is inexorably met by the same reaction. Even now she's still experimenting. Saying '_I love you_' to Emma Swan. Seeing the smile, hearing the '_I love you too_', sensing the warmth and gratefulness, feeling the love she's given in return for hers, tenfold, feeling the searing pain of the salt the words, the actual sentiment is to Emma's wounds.

Emma gets out of bed. In one go. No setting aside of sheets or using them as cover instead of the shirt she never put on last night. Emma gets out of bed naked and beautiful, but also naked beautiful without an ounce of care for any of that, including herself. She cares. Does anyone know what it's like to look at Emma Swan and want to destroy the world entirely, any world really and maybe more than one, so she can find the balm to Emma's mangled heart and self, so she and Henry never have to lose her? She does. She means it.

"I love you, too." Emma's fingers tuck a strand of hair behind Regina's ear. She hadn't noticed Emma getting close to her. She stayed at Emma naked, beautiful and surprised. "I want her to be all right. She's family." Emma kisses her on the lips, softly, enticingly. "I want you to be happy."

She's smart, Emma Swan, incredibly so. She had known it all along, though she'd refused to accept it in the beginning. Now she's come to cherish it wholeheartedly. Except when it comes to Emma's awareness of her own self. Because she knows, Emma does, that she's really a '_handful_' with the wave of the hand when she says it, to discard herself, and she behaves like she has to make up for it every single day through hard work and unwavering dedication.

The savior, in all her glory, and aren't the idiots proud.

She kisses back. She can't look up into Emma's eyes. At level all she can see is Emma's pulse on the soft skin of the pearly white throat she loves to lavish. She looks at her feet in perfect sixth. Happy is not a conversation she wants to have.

Regina steps into her red stilettos.

Emma loves her back. Emma wants her to be happy. She wants to snort. Oh no, not because of Emma, no, not even because Mother's voice says '_love is weakness._' No, she knows the answer to that one. '_As if you could_,' that's why she wants to snort.

Running isn't like her. It's Emma's department. She wants to run now. To her credit, she's never had an Emma Swan to lose before. She fights for her son, she never backs down. She fights for Emma, too, but she's backed down a couple times. Being Henry's mother is a lot easier to be absolute at, it comes naturally. Loving his mother is altogether destabilizing and perfect. It's infuriatingly right. She wants it so badly she thought she was ready for everything that was coming for them.

Obviously she's overestimated her capacity. She is not ready for Ruby Lucas.

Regina turns to the meridian chaise. She slips into her skirt, zipping it at the back in one swift and firm motion. She picks up her blouse.

"I'm going to go make coffee." Regina buttons her blouse absentmindedly. She can't look up, she can't stay.

"Regina…"

She walks away to the door, the staircase, the hallway, the kitchen. Regina stops in front of the coffeemaker, by the espresso machine. She likes espresso. It reminds her of all the spices Daddy showed her at the market when they would escape together while Mother was gone, manipulating and plotting for riches and influence. Papi knew his spices, his coffee beans and his flaws. Hers too. She likes espresso because the scent is thick and roasted, much more than regular coffee. Emma likes coffee from the coffeemaker. She doesn't mind only because Emma always asks her if she'll pour a shot of espresso in her mug too. Emma never got to learn better than to like coffee from the coffeemaker.

She likes a redeye with half her cup filled with warm milk and some sweetener. Regina likes a triple shot latte with sweetener. '_It looks the same, but it's different_', Ruby had explained.

She makes coffee. While it's brewing, the coffeemaker makes the same sounds as Henry does when he's finished drinking his soda with a straw at the diner. It makes her cringe every time he does it. He always looks sheepishly at her although she has never said anything about it, she's made certain of that. Ruby always laughs before sweeping in with a refill and Henry always beams at the girl. She's never thought about it until now but maybe Henry and Ruby have a special code for soda refills he's not supposed to get.

She tries not to care much when it's the coffeemaker though. Maybe because Emma always smiles and kisses her when she comes into the kitchen and her coffee is ready.

Regina prepares Emma's coffee, then hers. Hers cools faster; Emma is the only person she knows who drinks coffee or anything else almost lukewarm and never complains about it.

Regina leaves Emma's mug on the marble counter, she makes it slide just a little because it's neat and smooth. She likes marble. She takes hers to the window where she can see the back yard. She stares ahead to the rough run of dirt cutting through her perfectly manicured lawn.

Something tells her Red visits the property often, not only the nights they have their sessions.

Arms encircle her waist. Regina sighs. Nothing compares to the safety of Emma's arms. They ground her and keep her steady. Emma challenges her, in every way, in each way she needs to be the best of who she can be. Because being who she truly is and not just who she's been conditioned to be is a battle of every instant. She suffocates at times, when she thinks of the arsenal of toxic defense mechanisms, unhealthy responses, and dark impulses which always cloud, and sometimes obliterate any, if not all, of her attempts at living her life, at being her own person, no one else's.

"I… I had no hope, Emma, I had no one but Henry, and for the longest time it felt I didn't even have him. But you… you changed it all."

She's all over the place, but it never seems to faze Emma. Even in denial, they're always on the same train.

Emma draws closer and puts her head on Regina's right shoulder. "You've got me, Regina. You and the kid, you're my family."

She can see her green eyes looking at her in their reflection on the glass of the window. She strokes Emma's hands resting on her belly. Because Emma knows the game they're playing. Though they're both learning the rules.

"You find her attractive, too, don't you?" Emma kisses her throat, burning trails of lips and tongue. Everything burns. She can't help it either; any time she's in the position to touch Emma with her lips, or caresses, she has to. It burns, like magic does. Through her veins, in her heart. In her chest and her hair. Under her fingernails. In her scars. She comes to life when Emma touches her.

"Emma…"

"Shh." Emma kisses her jaw. "It's okay. Tell me, I want you to tell me."

Regina leans the side of her face to her temple. She looks at the path where Red goes to be free.

"I… Emma, please… I love you, I love you so much."

"She wants you. I can see it in her eyes, every time she looks at you. She wants you."

Ruby does. She does too. She wants both of them. It's all about the nuances.

Emma is not letting her hide, not today. She should be content. She's never, ever believed she could have this much, so why should she go after it all? Emma turns around to face her.

"Do you want her?"

"Does it matter?" Stalling is unbecoming. Her coffee is steaming up the window glass where she's put it down.

Emma kisses her, her throat, her neck, her lips. Her tongue is in her mouth too. She flicks and suckles and tilts Regina's head to kiss her deeper. It's like drinking passion, it burns so deliciously.

"You are so fucking beautiful." Emma's whispers under her ear cause her to shiver. It's a charm, a spell for abandon. She could forget herself in her kisses, in Emma's entirely too vast ability to love. She also knows avoiding the subject would be selfish and unfair. She loves Emma.

"Yes." She wraps her arms tightly around Emma's neck and hides her face in its warmth.

Emma's encircles her back, left fingers threading through her hair. "Thank you." Emma kisses her cheek.

"I want you more." She wants Emma to know that it's her. It's always been her.

"I know."

It's beautiful, selfless. Stupid, but beautiful. Charming, actually. Emma's heart is resilient, but ever so delicate. Confidence is not Emma's forte. Neither is trust, for either of them.

"Tell me what to do… Ruby… she matters. "

Emma shimmies a hand between them up to her chin. She opens her eyes to gaze into Emma's loving ones.

She's vibrating against her, pulsating. She's like a furnace giving off heating waves of Emma's essence. "I never ever wanted to believe in True Love." Emma breathes. "You and I… you burn inside of me. It's not just the magic."

She focuses on relaxing. It's her turn to securely wrap Emma in her embrace. "It's hard to tell, Emma, your magic is so incredibly strong. When we're together, it overwhelms everything else… I don't know that I am capable."

"You love deeper, stronger, more… just more than anyone I have ever known." Emma says it with certainty. "That's why I can't fault Ruby for desiring you, for wanting to be near you."

"There's magic in her too." Emma should be aware, she can't let Ruby be reduced to carnal desire in Emma's mind. The girl means more to her. "My magic is calling to her on some level, it's also feeding the bond we have."

"Regina..." Emma is being so good, Regina nuzzles the tender spot between her jaw and ear. "Even if there wasn't any magic to it, you and Ruby have something together, it's plain as day."

They have something, yes. There is no point in denying it. "I love you, Emma." She refuses to quiver, "I do have feelings for her."

"Are you in love with her?" It sounds like Emma is ready to pluck her own heart out of her chest to offer it in sacrifice, recklessly generous and forgoing all forms of self-preservation.

"I am in love with you, Emma." She needs her to know it, to feel it as deeply as she does, "What I feel for Ruby… it's strong, it's different. I haven't… I've refused to acknowledge our connection."

"Because of me?" Emma has a long way to go when it comes to self-worth.

"For myself." She brushes Emma's incomprehension with amorous fingertips. "Because I could not bear to hurt you, to maybe have you leave me."

Emma kisses her tenderly, to comfort, to soothe. Regina's heart aches that much more.

"Look at me," Emma asks her lovingly, longingly. Regina looks. "Whatever you decide, whatever you want, I love you, I am not leaving you."

Air is missing, yet she burns.

"Your coffee's gonna be cold." Emma nudges her softly. "Come on." Regina picks up her mug. Emma moves toward the marble counter where her coffee is, never letting go of her hand.

Only when Regina is settled on a stool does she release her fingers.

"I'll make you breakfast," Emma nods to herself and get the basket of farm eggs from the pantry. "I wanna try your omelet," she retrieves the fresh cut mushrooms, cherry tomatoes, scallions, and basil from the refrigerator "I think it's fantastic." She stops the door from closing with her foot. "Oops, forgot the cheese."

A pan sizzles softly with olive oil, Emma is cooking, offering her a smile over her shoulder every so often.

"Is she giving you something I'm not?"

She wants to forget all about the mutt and play Emma's tune instead. She wants to get rid of the conversation before her headache settles in.

"I haven't acted on anything, Emma."

"I know you haven't, I trust you."

There is a plate before her with delicious smelling food. She wants to be disgusted and not have an appetite, but her stomach rumbles.

Emma's laugh ends up making her smile. She feels lips on her cheek, fingers tucking her hair. "What is it you say?" She straightens up and looks at her very firmly. "Eat."

Emma settles on the side of the island, not next to her but not opposite either, and digs in.

"What do you think?"

"I am not sure how to explain it," Regina struggles with her trembling hand to lift the fork to her mouth. The omelet is really delicious, Emma is learning.

She struggles with what to say, too. They need to talk, they need to communicate. Both of them are so good at enduring, withstanding. She can't allow this to be a silent acceptance of her needs and let Emma deal with the emotional burden on her own.

"I only ever loved Daniel before you, Emma, I am not very good at… I am not good that way. I am definitely not good at dealing with others.

"We are doing well. I firmly believe that, for as crazy as it may sound, the Savior, the Evil Queen, when it comes down to it, we are right for each other.

"I want to be better. I want to be me. I want to, I want it so terribly much. It's how I can be with you. It's how I can be a better mother to Henry. It's how I can find reprieve.

"I mean, really, I've tried everything else." She gives a bark of laughter. Not a happy one.

"I wish I was better already because you deserve nothing less, Emma, nothing less, not from me." She looks in Emma's watery pools of blurred green then and gently takes her hand in hers across the marbled surface of the kitchen island.

"Ruby is gaining control of Red. She's taking over the wild, the dark, the monster. Not to destroy it, but to make it her own, to stop that from being bigger than who she really is. I am helping her, and she's so close, Emma. You should see her, she's becoming herself and that is so beautiful.

"Seeing her struggles and now her victory, I'm…"

Regina takes a swallow of her coffee, and a bite of her omelet.

When Emma says nothing, it dawns on her, "You meant the eggs." Idiot.

"Yeah," she has a smile at the corner of her mouth, "I kinda did." Emma lifts her knuckles to her lips, "But this is good too."

She gives her an eye roll, just for the form.

"Do you enjoy your power over her?" It's a fair question. Emma is smarter than she's given credit for. She always thinks so.

"I…" She had not expected that one, though. "I enjoy her trust in me, her… obedience too."

"Do you need me to-"

"Emma, no." That one needs to be smothered right here. "Our love-making is… we are equals." She stands and walks over to Emma's chair.

"I don't want your submission. I want you to be free, us to be free. If that means your surrender then I will guide you, and if other times it means mine, then I will follow you."

"Ruby is different." It's not a question but she answers it anyway.

"Yes," She needs this to end. "I enjoy seeing her in control of Red. Knowing it's possible, that I am part of it. I do that to her. I like that I can."

The look in Emma's eyes is soft, understanding."You need her too."

She can't hold it for long.

"Yes, I need her too."

She does. She needs Ruby. She needs Red. She chose red stilettos today.

Emma stands and wraps her arms around her neck. She feels the soft skin against hers almost at her nape.

"Then go to her."

Regina embraces her tightly into her. They're quiet for a moment. She closes her eyes and waits for the soft huffs of Emma's relaxed breath in her hair.

When she pulls back, she brushes her fingertips to Regina's throat. Where they both know Emma left a hickey earlier.

"You might want to put concealer on that thing, or wear a scarf maybe?" She's truly embarrassed, the sweet fool. Her sweet fool. Regina smiles.

"No."

Emma's gaze snaps right up, surprised.

"Ruby will see it." She says it quietly; Regina places a hand on her chest, stepping into their closeness. She thinks maybe Emma needs the mark to know she will be coming home.

Her voice is firm, the kind of tone that doesn't suffer question or refusal. "I belong to you, Emma."

"Yeah?"

"Yes." Regina kisses her nose lightly. "I'm off to work now." She disentangles herself from her and heads for the foyer. Emma helps her in her coat and opens the door for her.

"I'll see you later."

She's halfway off the threshold followed by Emma in her movement to close the door behind her. She turns around swiftly, her hand in Emma's unruly locks. She kisses her out of her wits.

"I love you so very much, Emma, don't be afraid." She looks at her with the softest smile she knows how to give, "I promise."

"'kay." Emma nods.

"Be safe." Regina wills herself away, bracing to face the day.


	2. Chapter 2

**Synopsis:** Regina never really thought she could have a shot at happiness, with her son, with Emma, the three of them a family. Love also comes in unexpected ways, it can't be boxed, or reined. Love is always free, whether we want it or not, whether we comprehend it or not. It is time for Regina to come to terms with the love in her heart.

**Setting:** Events in this story are situated in Storybrooke post Nerverland (3x09), established Swan Queen and AU from there.

**Rating & Warning:** The story is rated M for violent, sexual and altogether adult content. Please be advised that triggers and events of traumatic natures will be present throughout the story.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, movies, books, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work, and the characters, settings, and events thereof, are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for-profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context, and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

"_This is how an angel dies_

_I blame it on my own sick pride_

_Blame it on my A.D.D. baby_

_Sail!"_

Sail- **AWOLNATION**, _Megalithic Symphony_.

###

"Change again." She orders Ruby.

Regina's sitting on the highest step of the back patio. Ruby is standing, naked in front of her. With a shiver, Ruby turns into Red. The wolf is still looking at her, fur rippling, ears to her.

Red takes a couple of steps toward her. Magnificent.

"Again."

Ruby is now facing her. Eyes only for her. The girl takes a couple of steps more.

"Again."

Red is walking to her instead. The large black and gray head lowers to her knees. One last step and the beast is resting her head on her lap and into her chest. Fluffy and warm. Red's fur is so very soft.

Regina scratches her ears. The wolf likes it. She grunts, one of her contented ones. Regina likes Red. Everything is simple with Red.

"You will not be needing my help anymore, Miss Lucas." She says it softly. She's proud of her protegée.

Red's head lifts up with a powerful growl. Gigantic, soft hazel eyes, horrified. Her lips are pursed, impressive canines just a few inches from Regina's face. Red is huge.

"No." Ruby's jaw is set. She shakes her head in refusal once. Her hands are firmly gripping Regina's thighs. Anger and hurt shimmer in the girl's eyes.

She's managed to do what she didn't want to.

Regina tilts her head slightly, but she doesn't recoil from the proximity. She feels the waves of emotions radiating from the girl. She smells the earthy, lively green scent coming off of her. She's never paused long enough to actually notice it. Ruby smells of all the nature Regina loved when she was on her own. Before Rumple's corruption. When she wanted only but to be a simple stableboy's wife.

"I didn't tell you to change." She says it coolly. She watches, fascinated, the inner battle dancing in Ruby's eyes as it plays in the girl's mind.

She lowers her gaze to her hands on Regina's thighs. Red is now offering her neck in submission. Eyes closed.

Something tugs at her heart. Regina lifts her hands to pet the wolf's chest and shoulders. She wraps her arms around Red's neck, resting her face in her fur.

"It is your victory. You are in control. You have done well."

Red is pushing into Regina's chest as if to hide there. She allows it. She's not trying to hurt the girl. She's not trying to abandon her. When Red keeps pushing, she leans back on one arm. The wolf crawls into her even more, crying soft little whines.

"Ruby…" Red's distress tastes sour in her mouth. The wolf is literally shaking.

"You can't send me away. I can't." Ruby is looking at her. The girl is breathing hard above Regina, supporting herself on her hands in an extended push-up.

She's frustrated. She doesn't want to upset the girl so much. "Ruby, you succeeded. I am not sending you away. You simply don't need me anymore."

"I need you." Ruby's eyes are blurring with tears. She puts her cheek to Regina's, rubbing at her skin, nuzzling her gently. "You're my pack..." Ruby lets it float.

The girl is trembling, crying, begging. She's loathing herself for enjoying being needed and wanted so much. Enough that she could bring tears to the girl she's been trying to help be strong and independent.

"Granny is your pack, Snow is too." Ruby's skin is hot on hers. Her hair is soft between her fingers.

Ruby's warmth and scent are intoxicating. She chose red stilettos today.

"No," Ruby repeats it in Regina's ear, "they're different. Like Emma and Henry, they're family. You are… more."

She lets her face loosely follow the movement of Ruby rubbing her cheek against hers. Her forehead against hers. Her nose against hers. Ruby's mouth opens slightly. She's breathing the girl's gasps for air. Her lips are ghosting over hers. Not brushing. Not touching. Only tempting. Like a glass of scotch and a cigarette on a bad, bad, very bad day. The girl is addictive. Ruby's whine is a moan when she pulls away.

She understands. The bond they have both sensed is real and tangible. It's primal and intense. It's wild. Ruby chose Regina in a way that only makes sense to herself. To them. She wonders if Ruby actually chose her or if Red did.

"Look at me." She puts the Queen into it.

The girl tears her face away to look at her. She holds her gaze; she says nothing, she doesn't move a muscle. A single tear rolls down the girl's cheek. Regina catches it with her thumb. She wants to taste it. She wants to taste everything. Regina strokes her cheek until she feels her hand must retreat. She would take it all.

"Is it beyond your control?" The urgency in Regina's voice surprises both of them.

Because she's not sure it's not beyond hers.

"No." Ruby shakes her head. "It's not like that." It would be easier if it were. Not necessarily better. Yet again, she's always chosen the graveled path.

"Then, pray tell, how is it exactly?" The Queen bites.

"I don't have to. I just feel more… content. I feel safer, I feel truer, I feel I belong. With you." Ruby blurts it out as if waiting for a blow to ensue.

"Can I order you not to?" She's hearing Emma's voice in her head, watching her face as she asked '_Do you enjoy your power over her?'_

More tears fall, the girl's bottom lip trembles. Ruby whispers as she lifts herself up and looks away, "I'll do whatever you ask of me, if that's what you need."

'_I do_.' She chose red stilettos today.

"Ruby," Regina reaches for her face. Ruby leans into her touch with a sharp release of breath. The girl's been holding it. "That's a lot of power to give me." And it is. "Me, Ruby." Maybe even too much.

"We're bound." Ruby looks at her, challenging her to deny it. "I can't undo it. I still have my free will and my judgement. I'm not your puppet." Defiance shines through Ruby's tears. "I need you."

The girl is beautiful.

As if to prove her words, Ruby rips herself from Regina's hand cupping her cheek. She turns around and marches off towards the forest.

She knows Ruby will be back. They can't be apart. She didn't ask the girl to leave. She doesn't want her to.

Regina hurries after her. "I am with Emma, Ruby. I love her. We're good together. We're… I am better."

It's true. They're doing well.

Ruby stops but doesn't face Regina. "I know, we discussed it. She was my first stop when I understood what's been happening."

Regina catches up to Ruby's naked form, only a couple steps away from her. "You did what now?" She heard it just fine the first time.

Ruby faces her. "I went to Emma about us."

The slap explodes. Gunfire.

Ruby red is now the color of the girl's face. Her hand is about to slap her again on its way back. Ruby catches it.

Emma knew. Emma knew all along. She reminds herself to breathe.

"She gave her blessing." Ruby doesn't let Regina's eyes look anywhere but at her. "You already knew this. She left a message." Ruby's eyes fall to her left shoulder, at the birth of her neck.

Ruby doesn't let go of her wrist either. "I know you feel it too."

Of course she feels it too. That's just the thing, isn't it?

Her hand moves to the girl's abdomen. It registers in the back of her mind that the girl has a strong grip. Stronger than any man who's ever touched her. Not that they lived to tell the tale.

She looks at her fingers on her incredibly smooth skin. "It's just an itch," she denies. It has to be. Her fingernails bite into her taut flesh.

"If it's just an itch…" Ruby leans into her. "Scratch it. Scratch me, Regina. I can take it."

That magnetic, animalistic pull is here again. She feels the moisture between her legs. Slick. She knows Ruby can smell it. Because of Red.

"You presumptuous little bitch." She snarls it as her left hand grips at Ruby's throat.

"Your bitch." Her hand guides hers further down her abdomen. To the birth of pubic hair between her legs. To the engorged labia opening at her fingertips. Ruby is dripping wet. Boiling with it. For her.

Now there's an girl's arousal is coating her fingers. She rubs her fingertips together. Stretching. Spreading.

The feral growl that sounds between them isn't Red's.

She finds her entrance. The girl is tighter than Emma. She traces it. She's taller, more slender than either Regina or Emma. She should try to resist. When has she ever done what she ought? Ruby is parting her legs to give her access.

They're looking at each other waiting for the dam to break.

She feels her hunger grow. She wants the girl. She wants her begging and crying. Moaning and writhing. Beneath her. She wants Ruby to be so far gone Red takes over. She wants.

Regina enters her with two fingers. As deep as she can go. Ruby cries out. In pleasure. In need. In pain too. She lets go of her throat. She scratches her way to the girl's left breast, kneading it. She knows the swell of adrenaline crashing into her all too well.

It's the same that has Ruby's hips undulate with the taut muscles of her arm.

They're looking at each other. Ruby's eyes are glazed with passion. She can see relief and need. Fierceness and defiance. Wilderness and tenderness. All in the girl's eyes, adoring her.

Waiting for the dam to break.

Ruby arches into her hand. She pulls her in even deeper. The strain in her shoulder is enticing. She wants Ruby's orgasm, orgasms. All of them. Loving Emma is making her happier than she has ever allowed herself to whisper. But the girl… the girl is hers.

Ruby's chest is heaving in rhythm with her movements inside her. Her muscles are rippling. She's struggling to remain human. She wonders if Red would attack her. Or run free.

Regina crashes her mouth to her lips. She takes a kiss. Then another. And another. Until the girl is moaning in her mouth. Bending herself to Regina's will. Ruby gives so much.

Her fingers weave themselves in the chestnut curls. Her palm is on Ruby's jaw. Regina thrusts deeply. Relentlessly. The girl's mouth falls open in a cry. She pushes her thumb into it. Her lips wrapping around it as she caresses it with her tongue.

Ruby's moans are not Emma's uncontrolled breaths and groans of lost fights trying to keep her bearings. They don't resonate into her every single nerve ending. They don't gather in her chest before shooting to her abdomen. Exploding.

Ruby's moans are whines and cries she wants to drink and swallow. Washing into her.

She ravishes her lips anew. She uses her thumb to open the girl's mouth. Then her tongue replaces it. The feeling of Ruby suckling sends her spiraling. Her walls are begging her to never ever stop.

A loud whimper rips out of the girl's throat. She throws her arms around Regina's neck. Another hiss welcomes her digging nails as she lifts Ruby's right leg to her hip. The girl has more to give. She wants it all. Freedom.

She wraps her left arm around the her waist. She pulls her firmly into her body. She finds her clitoris with her right thumb as she thrusts.

"Regina… mmm…" The rest is lost in her neck. Ruby is so close. Patience.

"Show me." Regina kisses the girl's jaw. Coaxing her. Whispering in her ear. "You've been such a good girl." It aches. She aches. She yearns. "For me."

Ruby arches and clenches. The girl is delirious with need. "I… I've been good…" She pants.

"Yes," Regina curls her fingers inside her, where she's being guided by fervent hips. "You've been my good girl."

"Your… g...good…" Ruby gasps.

She licks the girl's ear from lobe to shell. "Mine."

Ruby's entire body shakes with the tremors of her crashing orgasm. "Oh… oh… Re...Regina…" Ruby screams. The girl is holding on to her neck, grinding onto her forearm, coming into her hand.

It's only beautiful. Ruby is beautiful. For her. She loves Emma so very much. She might have to figure out a way to love this girl too.

She cradles her into her arms. Her legs won't bear her weight for long. She calms the pace of her fingers inside her. She kisses her moaning throat and panting mouth. "My lovely girl."

Ruby shivers and sighs. She has her face in the warm curve of Regina's neck. Like it's safe and right. Her breathing is settling down. She accompanies Ruby's leg from her hip with a caress of her hand. She eases her fingers out of her once Ruby manages to let go of her wrist. She gathers the girl tenderly. She's being protective. She takes them both a couple steps back to a bench under a maple tree on the edge of her yard, where the forest begins.

"Rest." Her hand is soothing on Ruby's back, drawing circles. "Are you cold?"

"No." Ruby shivers. Her body is warm, it always is. She's cold though. And shy. Vulnerable.

"You're shivering." With a swirl of her hand, she conjures a fluffy blanket. The one she always keeps for her reading by the fireplace. She wraps the soft fabric around the trembling girl in her arms.

"Better." Regina feels Ruby's nod against her shoulder. "We can go inside if you wish. We can light a fire."

Ruby lifts her head to meet her gaze. She seems surprised. "It's May."

"It's Maine."

Her laugh chimes. Even the girl's laugh is free.

She wants to loathe it but Ruby's lips on hers are warm and soft. The girl lingers, exploring her mouth ever so gently. She closes her eyes. Different.

The kiss swells. She allows the girl's tongue in her mouth, patiently. She feels Ruby small yearning moans. She is making the girl weak. In a delicious way. Fingertips touch her face, her throat, her hair. The girl wraps her arms around her neck. There's never going to be any resistance. She deepens the intensity, putting her strength, her will in kissing the girl.

She's panting. She's turned, straddling the bench, a leg over Regina's lap. She allows Ruby to rest her forehead to hers. There's never going to be any resistance. Because the girl is hers. There are many ways to belong. It's just that this one is new.

"Are you going to let me do that again?" Ruby is breathing her in. She's touching her like they're never going to see each other again. Desperately.

"Come undone in my hand?" She chuckles. Humor makes things safer. Emma taught her that. "In my backyard?"

"Yes," Ruby whispers, "and kissing you."

"Would you like to?"

Ruby's lips on her throat are saying yes.

"You're not afraid of me?" As baffling as that may be.

"Why would I be? I chose you. I know who you are, Regina." The girl's hand is on her thigh. Stroking. "I was there, remember?"

"You don't know anything about me."

"Red loves you."

"Are you… two-fold?"

"No, I am Red and Red is me. But we're also two. It's like my personality is enhanced, and when I'm human some things come forth, when I am wolf, others are prevalent."

"So the wolf loves me." Big deal. She rolls her eyes. Just in case.

Ruby cups her cheek. The girl is daring. "I love you."

That stuns her. Like the slap earlier. The slap Ruby probably barely felt. These words are for Emma.

"I have grown to love you, every day more because you listen to me, you believe in me, you care for me, you understand me. You are the only one I've met so far who I can truly be myself with."

"Ruby-"

"Red fell in love with you the instant I changed in front of you. The first time, right here. Maybe even back then."

"Do you realize-"

"Are you two-fold?"

The brat.

"No, I am not."

"Who are you?"

Stupid mutt.

"I am Regina Mills."

"So you are. So you always were. You've been in a lot of pain for a very long time and you did horrendous things. You were the Queen, and at times you did evil things." The girl shrugs, and she would.

"I did evil things. Every single time I decided to turn, I knew I would make a blood bath. I killed many of your men."

"You were defending yourself." She's irritated. The girl's hand is caressing her stomach, under her shirt.

"If that were true, it still wouldn't make me feel warm and fuzzy inside. You and I know it isn't so."

"I threatened you." She must be losing her touch, because it seems she has not been able to inspire the fear of god neither in this girl or the other in her life.

"You made me a cloak."

"I could have killed you." She had been fascinated by the beast.

Ruby is unbuttoning her shirt. Fingertips featherly caress her sides up to her breasts.

"I could have killed you." The girls lips are on her jaw, on her collarbone, on her chest.

The blanket falls back as Ruby slides down. She didn't change, stockings, skirt, shirt and jacket.

"I like your shoes."

She chose red stilettos today.

Ruby is kneeling at her feet. Hands warm on her thighs, sliding longingly to her knees. She looks down into her begging eyes.

Fingertips at the hem of her skirt.

"Your scent is driving me insane." The girl blushes red. It's not shyness. Lust.

Her hands stroke their way up to her underwear. She pulls and with absolutely no resistance, the garment is gone.

"I'm going to taste you." Ruby kisses the inside of her parted thighs. She actually bites her right inner thigh in a mouthful. Regina's hand fly to her hair with a hiss. She is using the other one for leverage on the bench when Ruby makes her arch and tilt back, lifting the same thigh to her shoulder.

Regina wants to speak. She wants to retort and gain the control back. Her control. She's in charge here. The girl is spreading her, shifting her, positioning her. Red is in her every moves.

She's taken. Red is in Ruby's eyes.

She relaxes her head back against the trunk of the tree behind her. She closes her eyes. She presses Ruby's face to her. She gasps.

The girl's tongue laps at her. She's so very wet, she feels her arousal pouring out of her freely. The girl moans, she swallows. There's a poignant stab of need making her clench on her tongue. Ruby swallows again. Regina bucks in her mouth.

The dam breaks.

Regina presses and pulls. Ruby pushes and nuzzles, her clitoris, her cunt. A firm hand kneads at her apex and abdomen, sending rolling waves of pleasure from her core crashing into Ruby's mouth. The girl is panting, grunting as she fucks her. She would care that her hips are undulating at Ruby's will, but she swallows again and Regina can't help but cry out.

"Oh… Red." Her voice breaks at the realization of whom she's called.

The girl stares at her, glistening lips and creased brow. The magic swirls in Ruby's eyes. Red is bleeding into her.

Fingers she can't look at enter her slowly, deeply. There's only the girl's eyes. Ruby doesn't smile. She thrusts into her, with a strength and a speed Emma could never sustain. Because of Red.

She's the one whimpering now. She bites her lip, hard. She doesn't taste copper or herself until Ruby's tongue is mixing them in her mouth. The kiss is demanding, hungry. Animalistic.

The girl's hands never stop. One is between her thighs, the other kneads and presses at her back to rock deeper. Regina wraps her arms around her neck. Kissing, panting, rocking with her thrusts. The muscles in the girl's shoulders and back are so taut, it feels like she's going to rip her own skin. Regina grips to Ruby's body with her thighs, her arms, her hands grasping.

She's going to scream, and come. Not with Emma. The girl is calling her name.

"Regina." She pleas. "Regina." She begs. "Regina."

She's going to scream, and come. She can feel Red under the surface of Ruby's skin. She's breathing in her ear, desperately trying to keep control.

"Regina."

"Ruby."

The girl looks at her, swirling silver in darkened eyes. Like the moon.

She wants to let go. She wants to be free. Like Red.

She feels herself shaking. She opens her mouth for air she can't breathe. Her orgasm is pooling in the depth of her. It's like a tide too high. There is no way but release. In her nerves, in her blood, in her magic.

She moans. She can't avert her eyes from the girl's moonlight ones.

"Oh R..." She chokes. Her forehead falls to Ruby's.

The girl kisses her. It's passion, and love, and recognition. They do belong.

"My Queen."

It's unexpected. It's illicit. She comes so hard she realizes the wind has been knocked out of her. She doesn't scream. She sucks in all the air she can. She exhales in a whisper, surrendering to the waves of her pleasure.

"Red."

The girl explodes.

She bounces back a few yards in such a swift, majestic and powerful shot of her whole body. There's a snarl. Red is facing her. She looks at the moon, following Red's head. She thinks maybe her wolf needs to run.

"I'll be fine."

Red growls and huffs. She takes a couple of steps toward Regina. She sniffs at the air, her head low, inching forward. Another few steps, her large head and long muzzle almost between her legs. She has sat back up on the bench. She doesn't close her legs, but puts a gentle hand on top of Red's head instead.

The wolf sniffs at her again and lets out a contented puff of air. Regina chuckles softly. There's the dart of a very pink tongue licking her right inner thigh once, it makes her shiver. The large head levels up with her lap and Red presses her forehead to Regina's chest and stomach.

She embraces her wolf, finding the refuge of the soft fur to rest her face and close her eyes. She pets Red's ears and crown, where she knows the beast likes it best.

She gives affection and tenderness in silence. Lulled gently by Red's impressive breathing. She's calm and warm. She feels content somehow. It's foreign, yet natural. She does need Ruby. How Emma can even begin to understand it, to accept it, she still can't fathom. The absence of judgement, the unconditional love. It's so new to her it would be laughable, if it wasn't so pathetic.

It's ruining her reputation really.

Regina strokes Ruby's hair for a long time. She's covered the girl with the discarded blanket when she changed. She doesn't really know how much time has passed. Ruby's knelt, sitting with her legs to the side between hers, naked, on the ground. The girl's cheek is hot against her stomach, but she's getting cold, her opened shirt ruined, her skirt hiked up to her waist.

"Come." She says it as she pulls them both up.

Ruby follows, she doesn't need to turn to feel her walking in her steps. She leads them back inside, through the kitchen, to the door that leads to the basement of the house. The girl is quiet, it's almost surreal. Her barefeet barely make the whisper of a sound, assured and light. If Ruby is curious, she doesn't say a word.

They've converted the basement for training. Training in magic, physical training, her potion making lab has an entire wall dedicated to plants with growing walls, shelves of dried herbs and jars of all sorts of ingredients, benzene becs and tubes and intricate swirls of traveling pipes of glass and copper. It conducts heat very equally and doesn't melt at regular temperatures. It's ideal for potions really, and jam.

They have boxing equipment, weights and mats. They also have a couch, a fireplace, a fridge, a computer. And books, many, many books. There is a storage room to the far side, and a bathroom. It's a large bathroom, in a large basement, that has been refurbished and carries all the amenities they need. Henry calls it their lair, _'like the Batcave, Mom._'

She only stops in the bathroom. She relieves the girl from the blanket that will need washing. She drops her shirt on top of it, and extricates herself from her skirt. Ruby is watching her intensely. Regina can hear her breathing that way she does when she's trying to keep her control and prevent herself from moving, or turning. Something apparent to satisfaction settles in the pit of her stomach. Regina discards her unclasped bra, and the rest of her clothes follow after she steps out of the red stilettos she chose to wear today.

She's naked, facing a speechless Ruby. She could make a show out of it, but it's late. The girl is famished and tired, she can see it, and so is she. Regina steps in the walk-in shower to start the streams. She then stands at the double sinks and makes quick work of removing her make up. Ruby isn't wearing any, but she's studying her every move and expression with an avid stare.

When Regina goes to the shower, letting the large showerhead above her drench her in hot relaxing water, she doesn't need to open her eyes to know Ruby has followed her.

Emma wouldn't need her to speak, she would smile and look up, shy and clumsy, feeling inadequate but loving the attention more than she would know how to say, hence the silence between them.

"I missed a few twigs." It's not that Ruby needs her to speak, but this is new, and not pathetic.

"I get them from Red." The girl is against her now, her eyes closed under the stream as she works a couple of twigs and knots out of her hair.

Ruby's hair is long and thin, wavy and very soft. She likes the gentle curls of chestnut color, sometimes auburn. Her skin is fair, but Emma is fairer. They both contrast with her darker skin, darker hair and darker eyes. With her darkness. Sometimes she catches herself thinking, fleetingly, that maybe it isn't so, not so much at all.

She massages Ruby's scalp with shampoo. The girl's neck is relaxed, her head follows the movements of her hands. There is a contented smile on her lips, and Regina doesn't miss her appreciative little grunts. She's enjoying her ministrations.

She chuckles and keeps rubbing a little longer before pulling the girl back under the main shower stream to rinse her hair.

"I like it when you scratch my head."

Regina gets some foam away from the girl's ears. That earns her a shiver.

"I like when you rub my ears too."

She's washing away the last of the shampoo from the girl's head when she feels tentative hands touch her own scalp. Ruby finds her eyes in askance. They're tender and- Regina sighs, Ruby is giving her the perfect puppy dog look.

She doesn't pull away or ducks from under her hands. The girl smiles widely. She massages and rubes, not too energetically, regularly checking on her with a short glance away from what she's doing.

When her own hair is free of foam, Regina lathers Ruby's body with shower gel. Hers, like the shampoo. She takes a washing cloth and she scrubs the dirt and sweat off of her. She starts with the front of a suddenly blushing Ruby.

"Turn around."

The girl gives her a look and a sigh, but she turns. She scrubs the shoulders and upper back first. An idea strikes her, and maybe it's silly, but even the girl's laugh is free. She travels down to the lower back and ass, going back up to Ruby's right side.

"Hey! That tickles!"

She says nothing, but slows for a moment. She avoids Ruby's sides until the girl relaxes, and then teasingly visits the left one.

"Regina!" Ruby turns around in a swirl of slippery limbs and pushes her against the cold wall of the shower, the culprit wrist in her hand.

She smirks. She's amused at the girl's reaction. She shows her defiance with a raised eyebrow, feigning innocence.

"Why dear, you have dirt everywhere," She pushes against Ruby uselessly, "with your running around naked all the time."

Ruby looks at her with sparkling hazel eyes. She leans in and claims her lips, with authority and passion. She kisses her back, refusing the afterthought that she's in fact surrendering.

There is enough intensity in their kissing one another for slippery, steamy sex. Regina isn't certain it's what they need now, but she is certain she hasn't the slightest desire to stop Ruby should she make the move.

The girl however, chooses to remove the washing cloth from Regina's hand and busy herself with returning the cleaning gesture.

"You like me naked." Truth.

Her voice is soft. The water travels down her back as she strokes her gently, caressingly. Ruby is observing her own hand moving on her body. She kneels at Regina's feet, focusing her attention to her abdomen and sex, then her legs entirely.

"Yes, I do." Regina finds the girl's chin with her fingertips. she pushes upward to make her look up. _'You are beautiful.'_ She doesn't say the words.

She means them. The cheeky brat devouring her with her eyes and covering her in soap has changed into the nervous, inadequate girl who's resigned to never being good enough. Human enough.

"You like Red better."

"Stand up."

Ruby stands immediately. They both know why. Regina can't help but enjoy it. It's not dark, but it's great nonetheless. Power.

"It wasn't Red between my legs, Ruby."

"It wasn't just me, and you love it."

God she does.

They stand quietly gazing at each other for a moment. The stream has rinsed them off, She's turned it off. The girl is the first one to back down. Ruby knows her place. She actually loves it. Regina understands this startlingly clearly. Bond.

She cups Ruby's cheek, much like the girl did her earlier. "I care for all of you, Ruby."

"You're more comfortable around Red."

She strokes the girl's cheek because she wishes the gesture to appease her and make her see. She'd like it better if she didn't have to say any of this.

"Red is easier."

She's expecting Ruby to ask why, but she doesn't. It has attracted her all along. Unpredictable.

"When I'm Red, I sense you. Always. I know what you feel, what you want. I have no doubt." Ruby steps closer into her, leaning in her hand. "All I have to do is get close to you, nuzzle around until you let me in and you feel better."

"You sense me?"

Ruby nods into her touch.

"Everything. I guess it's normal." Ruby scoffs, but it seems obvious she can't bring herself to step away from the fingers on her cheek. "Since I am your pet now." Compelled.

"Red is my pet, yes." How she loves it, that pride, that fierceness, that contrasting vulnerability. She loves it in both of them. The women in her life. In her Little Prince too.

"Ruby," Her other hand cradles the girl's face, "you are my wolf."

Ruby smiles. A shy, pleased, slowly blooming nothing of a smile while that actually sinks in.

"Yours?"

Emma would have asked _'really?'_, and it is how huge the difference is between them. Ruby has doubts and fears. She also has an undeniable confidence when she comes into herself. She's a werewolf. Emma has abandonment issues and anxieties that run so very deep, it makes Regina feel like being a murderous witch. Oops.

Regina smiles at her girl and her insecurity. She rolls her eyes, and in the movement of passing her out of the shower, she kisses her forehead.

"Mine."


	3. Chapter 3

**Synopsis:** Regina never really thought she could have a shot at happiness, with her son, with Emma, the three of them a family. Love also comes in unexpected ways, it can't be boxed, or reined. Love is always free, whether we want it or not, whether we comprehend it or not. It is time for Regina to come to terms with the love in her heart.

**Setting:** Events in this story are situated in Storybrooke post Nerverland (3x09), established Swan Queen and AU from there.

**Rating & Warning:** The story is rated M for violent, sexual and altogether adult content. Please be advised that triggers and events of traumatic natures will be present throughout the story.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, movies, books, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work, and the characters, settings, and events thereof, are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for-profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context, and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

"_Runners in a rainstorm  
To try to cross enemy lines  
I love you , do you love me?  
But are we reaching our potential?_"

Reaching the Potential- **A Silent Film**, _Sand And Snow_.

###

"I won't fetch. Don't even try to have me do tricks." Ruby swallows a big bite of her bloody roast beef sandwich served with a warm plate of parsley sauteed potatoes. "jhis is sho goof."

"Don't speak with your mouth full."

Ruby rolls her gleaming hazel eyes, that are so playful and make her agree to silly things. Like letting the girl choose what Regina is to wear after their shower in the walking closet she got dragged in. Or having her dry both their hair while the girl is sitting on the floor in the middle of her bedroom she shouldn't have let her in. Or letting Ruby put a spray of her perfume on the shirt she shouldn't have lent her, _'You smell really good. Red likes it too.'_

Like that's a magical formula. She's getting soft is what it is. Soft for a blonde. And a dog.

"You fetch well enough, dear. You've been doing tricks for me for months."

Ruby pouts. "I am a wolf, not a dog."

The girl is being a goof. In Emma language that means she doesn't know how to behave. In Ruby language, she's her friend after all, it means exactly the same thing. Shyness.

She's asked all these things for reassurance. Testing boundaries, wearing her clothes, asking meaningful questions under the cover of cracking jokes. It means only one thing. She does it too, except she's a bitch about it, not a sweet fool.

"Henry says Red's so big you could ride me." Ruby's gaze falls to her hands on her lap. "Would you… would you like that… some time… in the forest?"

She sets her own fork down and stands up from her bar chair to grab them drinks in the fridge. She places a bottle of diet coke and a glass in front of the girl, and gets mineral water for herself.

"Are you-" Regina feels a piercing pain to her heart. She freezes mid-sentence and halfway back to her seat. She doesn't realize she's dropped her glass until she sees it picked mid-air by Ruby's hand in slow motion. She feels her fingers clutching at her chest though.

Next thing she knows, the glass is on the kitchen island and arms are wrapped around her protectively. The piercing pain has recessed, it's a throbbing ache now.

"Regina?" Ruby finds her eyes. She manages to focus her gaze to make the girl's deep concern for her. "Breathe."

Emma is hurt. Emma is hurt. She felt it. She feels it. Emma is hurt somewhere. Or worse.

She breathes because she needs to function and find Emma and tell Ruby. They have to help Emma.

"Emma." She swallows once and twice because her throat went dry with fear. She's rarely ever felt this frightened before. "Emma is hurt."

"Call her." That's her girl. No questions asked. She's looking for ways to help the woman she loves. Regina needs her to. Emma is hurt.

Ruby gets her phone on the counter right by the entrance of the kitchen itself. Regina unlocks it, dials. It rings. _'Hey… you've reached Emma Swan. Leave a message.'_ She does it again. Voicemail greets her a second time.

"She's on patrol tonight, right?" She nods. "Go get me a shirt of Emma's in the dirty laundry."

Regina goes. A location spell would be faster. She should have made wards for Emma. Henry has them. They're directly linked to her. That's the reason why Emma refused to have any. _'It's enough that his protection would drain your life force or whatever you want to call it. I am not having you bind yourself to me too. It could kill you. Teach me instead.'_ At which point _'Operation Batcave'_ saw the light of day.

Henry has a permanent shield, somewhat like the one she's used herself to train with Ruby. Somewhat because it's much more rounded and it simply won't break for anything that threatens their son, be it of the mind or physically. The spell underneath the enchantment is directly linked to her. The shield draws from her magic, from her essence, what Emma had called her life force. It activates and strengthens according to Henry's need, for as long as necessary and as strongly as necessary. A life for a life. Essentially.

The only person who can lift the spell is her. Or death. Emma can only interrupt the enchantment or transfer it to herself if Regina is no more or too depleted to do it of her own accord. Not that she would. Ever.

She finds Emma's Red Sox baseball t-shirt from her days in Boston. She wore it last playing catch with Henry. May is nice out after school. She brings the shirt to her face, closing her eyes. She breathes in deeply. Emma.

When she enters the kitchen again, Ruby is just hanging up. "I can't reach anyone at the station. Dispatch is on forward to Emma's cell. Granny isn't picking up, David either."

"I will do a location spell. It's more efficient than you running around trying to find a trail."

"Do you need something specific?"

"A map. It's all downstairs."

They swiftly go down to the basement. Ruby gathers their phones and stands back, out of her way. The girl doesn't ask questions while she retrieves the items she needs.

She opens a map of Storybrooke. It's obviously not your average gas station over the counter map. They've tweaked it, as Emma puts it. It shows the different townlines, the magical focal points, the deposits of fairy dusts they've researched and other key magical spots around Storybrooke.

She finds what she's looking for and closes her fists around a rich green tourmaline, as green as Emma's emerald eyes. Her birthstone.

Regina breathes in slowly. She has to be calm. She finds the place inside her mind where nothing means. Only her will. Only her power. Her magic whirls and swirls. In her chest as she breathes, in her arms and hands, in the flow of her blood. It runs and slides, it grows.

Her phone rings.

She exhales and swallows the flow of the advancing magic raising inside of her. She opens eyes she knows are glowing of the amethyst color of her magical essence.

Ruby hands her the phone; it's showing David's name. She pockets the tourmaline.

"Regina?"

"Is she alive?" She feels herself breaking. She has to get the words out. Ruby is at her side. She leans on the girl's forearm while she feels her hold her firmly.

"Yeah." She usually dislikes it when she's reminded how much Emma resembles her father. She hasn't a care in the world for it right now. "She got stabbed."

She puts a hand to her mouth to stifle the anguished cry that bursts out of her.

David goes on somberly, "She's been rushed to the hospi-"

Regina hangs up on him and turns into Ruby's arms embracing her.

"Hold on to me."

Ruby nods. She releases the lid she's put on her magic when the phone rang.

The hospital Emergency bay is the most familiar to her, and where she knows how to find a nurse to direct them to Emma. She rounds to the desk tended by a short woman she doesn't recognize.

"Sheriff Swan was brought in minutes ago, where is she?"

"Only family members are allowed in, Your… Ma'am."

She has no patience for this masquerade.

"Surgery is on the first floor." Ruby's voice is soothing. A gentle hand weaves with hers. "Come on."

"Ma'am! You can't go up there."

"Get the fuck out of her way." Ruby is growling. It's impressive. Not only because Ruby is faster than her to react. The nurse seems to think so as well.

They short but run up the stairs, pushing heavy doors which say _'Restricted - Authorized Personal Only'_ in big red capital letters. She pinpoints Snow's dark head right away. Another desk with a nurse she doesn't even bother to register.

"Mom!"

Her baby is running to her. It doesn't matter that he's twelve_ 'almost thirteen, Mom'_, that he wants to be taken seriously. Since they've been back from Neverland, they're them again. They're a family, and they've taken Emma in. They have bumps and fights. They're not perfect but they manage. She loves them like that. Together.

He collides into her with his arms around her middle, his face tucked in right under her chin. She envelops him as best she can, kissing the crown of his head. She presses him firmly into her.

"I am here now, Henry."

He pulls away. His eyes are welling with tears. He's shaking, his bottom lip quivering. "Mom, you have to help her! She's hurt, she was bleeding everywhere."

Henry shouldn't be here. They've let him see his mother covered in blood. She feels the anger simmer in the pit of her stomach. It dries her of her patience.

"Mom… I'm scared, Mom." He's gripping her hands as hard he can. He's getting strong. "Emma's not gonna die, right? You won't let her die, right Mom?"

She wants to promise that no, Emma is not going to die. She won't let her. Emma is strong and stubborn. She loves them so very much. She doesn't know. She won't lie. Believing isn't her area of expertise. It's his. Emma is the one who keeps the promises. Her sweet fool.

"Emma is strong, Henry. She's going to fight and I'll help her as much as I know how."

She pulls him into her again, but this time she looks up from the brown top of his messy hair. Ruby is still standing close to them. She's looking dead ahead, to her grandmother. Eugenia is standing behind Snow and Charming who are both on their feet, clamped together, observing her.

Idiots. They were called first. They were probably called before Emma arrived at the hospital. They brought Henry. Worthless. Useless. How could they bring Henry? How could they actually not even bother protecting their grandson from being further traumatized.

He's only a boy. Her baby boy.

She keeps Henry's hand in hers. They walk up to the Whites.

"Regina," David greets her, his arm protectively around Snow's shoulders.

"Where is she?"

Snow finally looks up. Her eyes are shot with blood and her nose blotted from all the tears she's evidently shed.

"She's in surgery." Snow's voice is hoarse. She looks weak. It doesn't tell her anything, Snow is weak. That's what happens to people who grow up wanting for nothing and only preoccupied by what matters to them. Even hardship gets coped with better. David is pale, paler than she's ever seen him. That concerns her more. "She's been stabbed, three times." Snow hides her face in David's chest and sobs loudly.

Three times. Three times where? Because that changes things. Drastically.

"Henry, sweetheart, go with Granny? There must be a vending machine somewhere, you should eat something."

"They don't know anything." He's only talking to her, oblivious to his grandparents who are staring at him with surprise.

He sounds so much like her. If Emma was with them, she'd roll her eyes at her because she has no intention of _'dealing'_ with his… Henry is not supercilious. He's genuinely intelligent. He doesn't embarrass himself with sugar coating other people's feelings. She's made certain he has a healthy self-esteem, unlike his mother. Mothers, truly.

"Henry-"

"I want to stay with you, Mom." He looks at her intently. "All they know is that there was a fight at the Rabbit Hole. The bartender found her in the back alley and called it in. Then we came here, Dr. Whale came out of the emergency room and said they were taking Ma to surgery. She had lots of blood and I heard doctor Whale say she has a col..." He's squinting his eyes really hard and she knows the word he's looking for. "Something with her lung.

"Can I stay with you, Mom?"

"Yes, you can. But you're still going with Granny to the vending machine to get something to eat."

She's trying to keep it together. She feels surrealistically emotional. It's… confounding. Ruby is standing next to her, hands clenching and unclenching. She's not the only one being angry.

"Okay."

A look to Eugenia and she is walking away from the lounge with Henry.

"Explain yourselves."

"We really don't know much else-" David starts, defensive of course. Snow looks wounded and offended. Entitled.

Regina feels the coolness of ice cold fury burn in her veins worse than fire.

"You let our son see his mother stabbed, unconscious, bleeding."

"Regina-" Snow tries. She would.

"Silence!" Regina actually raises her voice and that startles all of them. She must be a mighty sight because they all shrink an inch or two. That's more like it.

"You came here, with our son," she's hissing, but her voice raises at the mention of Henry, "not knowing if my wife-" Snow's eyes grow wide at the word. She didn't mean to, but that's who Emma is.

That's who Emma is.

She swallows hard. There is a sob stuck in her throat. Like a goddam itch that won't go away.

"Not knowing if Emma, if his mother… Seeing her hurt. Do you have any idea how irresponsible that is?! Could you not think of anything but yourselves once?"

"My daughter is injured!"

"Emma is with me!" How do they still not understand that they're a family. That Emma is her family, with Henry. They're their own family. "We are," she makes a circle gesture between the corridor and herself, "Henry and I, we are Emma's family first.

"I shouldn't have to make this clear to you, Snow. When you get a call, which you sure as hell shouldn't get first if anyone did put their mouth where their words are- because we updated her emergency contact to me as primary contact months ago- then you don't rush like a brainless fish to the hospital with my twelve year old son! You call his mother!"

"Emma is Henry's-"

"Yes, yes, yes! Emma is Henry's mother. I am Henry's mother. We are his parents. Together."

She looks at Snow deep and dark because when, when, when, when is this ever going to end?

"I love her." Not that she owes any clarification to anyone. "And you may think her a fool but she loves me."

"We know she loves you." David catches her eyes. To his credit he looks ashamed. She doesn't feel forgiving. "We shouldn't have brought Henry and we should have called you."

"Yes, you should have." She wants to shake Snow out of the indignant self-righteous look of the ever wounded mother she's sporting. "You are a Princess," Snow is going to hear it, willing or not, "you are to be a Queen, Snow, behave like one."

"I don't need advice from you."

"You're a petulant child, who can't be bothered to actually think about the consequences of her actions before she runs head first into them."

She looks at David then, nipping his retort in the bud. As far as she's concerned, unless they want Snow to stop breathing shortly, this conversation is over.

"Who did this to her?" What she really wants to do is find the surgical block Emma is in, hold her hand and never let it go. She could even try to heal her. It's too dangerous now. By Emma's side is where she belongs.

"We don't know yet." Or she could find the scum who hurt the woman she loves and kill him.

"And you're not out there looking for them? Must I do everything myself?" It won't make Emma better, but it'll calm her nerves.

"I figured making sure my daughter makes it is more important than a manhunt right now."

"What if they run? What if they get out of Storybrooke? tonight! She was in uniform. They must know who they stabbed and left in a goddamn alley! What if they hurt someone else? You're the Deputy Sheriff!"

She stares at him, harsh and cold. The Queen is here. "You better find them before I do."

Her breathing is ragged. They're idiots, both of them. Idiots supposed to rule a kingdom. And a city they still don't have elected a new Mayor for. She's clutching at her heart. It hurts so badly.

Emma.

The tears assail her. They overflow her. She tries to keep them in.

"Hey…" Ruby has her arms around her. A warm shield of chestnut hair and big, tender eyes separating her from everything else. There's a hand on hers at her heart. "Breathe."

She nods. She breathes. It aches with every beat.

"I should go to her. Try to-" She's interrupted by another piercing prang of pain. She's panting slightly.

"Regina, you can't. Whatever is going on, you're connected to her. It's too dangerous."

Ruby stands tall, but her eyes shimmering with worry.

"She'll make it." She's talking to her and only to her. "She's a tough kid." Ruby's chuckle is affectionate. It wants to be reassuring. They're friends too. She forgets it sometimes. She certainly did today.

Fucking around with the mutt while Emma was out getting stabbed.

She pushes against her suddenly. To no avail. "Don't go there." Maybe she's obvious or the girl knows her well. "It's not your fault. You didn't do anything wrong."

She shakes her head. Ruby pulls her closer.

"Tell me what you need." The girl wipes her tears with a stroking thumb. She helps with the back of her own hand. "I'll go find you that son of a bitch if that's what you need."

She nods.

"All right."

Ruby stands tall. Her wolf. She chose red stilettos today.

"You don't have enough of my daughter you also need to have my best friend?"

The girl's entire body tenses against hers.

"Snow!" David's voice is the closest to chastising she's ever heard him be.

"Someone needs to make sure people are safe." Ruby doesn't let her go. Not an inch. It's intimate in the middle of them all. "It's what Emma was trying to do." It's clear who the girl stands by.

"And you're just going to hand whoever did this over to her?" Snow sounds incredulous.

"If I haven't killed them first."

"Who are you killing, girl?" Eugenia's voice is firm enough to diffuse the bomb Snow's jealousy was about to set off.

They haven't seen Ruby like she has. Confident. Intent. She has come into herself. Her grandmother doesn't need much more than a glance at them to grasp the concept of what is really going on. Eugenia's gaze is heavy on her. Just as heavy as when she was barely seventeen, married against her will, finding solace in the forest when she could escape.

Regina decides she's not going to dwell on the fact that Eugenia Lucas is a werewolf blood all of her own. Old or not. She's keen and sharp and will most likely be for longer a time than they all bet on her for.

Granny has Henry's hand in hers. He's quiet. He's watching.

"I am going to get whoever did this to Emma."

"You do that," is all Eugenia Lucas answers her granddaughter.

"I won't be long." Ruby gently relaxes her hold. She walks away and tenderly brushes Henry's hair as she passes him without pausing.

She's half way down the corridor before Regina actually lets out the breath she was holding and manages to whisper, "Be careful."

They all sit back down. Granny to her left, Henry to her right. Charming and Snow on the opposite row of old-fashioned and uncomfortable chairs.

She answers Henry's questions as best she can. She accepts the chocolate he got for her at the vending machine. She holds his hand and pets his hair when he puts his head in her lap.

She let's David cover him with his jacket when he finally dozes off, "I love you, Mom."

They wait. In silence. They don't want to disturb him.

Regina estimates a couple hours when Ruby walks back in the family lounge of the ICU & surgery floor.

The girl's clothes are a bit rustled, but untouched. It's apparent she scrubbed her hands and face before rejoining them. She's barefooted as is her custom nowadays. Except when she's working at the diner.

Eugenia stands without being asked; she moves over the opposite row, sitting right in front of her. Ruby takes her grandmother's seat by her side. She's leaning her way, an arm on the back of her chair.

The girl delicately brushes Henry's hair off his face. "Any news?"

"They had me give some blood." David answers her, "how did it go for you?"

"It's hand-" She's interrupted by a blue cladded Whale. Doctor Whale. The monster with Emma's life in his hands.

Snow and Charming shoots to their feet. So does Ruby, taking her hand in hers.

She won't brusque Henry. The mad scientist and herself quickly appraise each other during the instant it takes Whale to walk over to them. He makes the wise choice of addressing her.

"The surgery went as well as we could hope for. The next hours will tell us more about her recovery, but I'm confident she's out of the woods." At least he's not meek. "She was lucky, considering the beating she took. The wounds were deep, she collapsed a lung and perforated a kidney, couple broken ribs and bones in her right hand. The sheriff lost a lot of blood but thanks to the Prince, we were able to transfuse her with the best replacement she could hope for."

"Can we see her?" Snow asks with a cry.

"She's still in ICU for now. She's sleeping off the anesthesia. She won't wake up for another few hours."

"I am not leaving her." She interrupts him because she knows he's about to tell them to go home and rest; nobody can see her.

"Regina…"

"I am not asking you, Victor." She scowls and his face contorts in a grimace. "Take me to her."

"Very well, but just you." He looks at Snow and David, "I mean it. You can see your daughter tomorrow when she's awake and rested enough that she can stay conscious. We're giving her strong medications against the pain."

Snow looks like she's going to protest but then, after a long glance to Regina, she simply presses Whale's hand between hers. "Thank you, Doctor."

"Henry, darling." She kisses his forehead, calling his name a second time. He stirs in his light slumber and by the time he's gotten his bearings, he looks scared and worried all over again.

"Is Emma ok?"

"Yes, sweetheart, Doctor Whale says the surgery went well."

He smiles tiredly, "Can I go see her now?"

"She's still asleep from the surgery, Henry. Only one person can go in her room for now, until she wakes up."

"Oh." He looks at her watery eyes for a few sleepy moments. She doesn't have the energy to fight her nerves betraying her. "You should go then. She's going to be scared if she wakes up without you and she's not home."

His heart is as precious and pure as is his mother's. Even if Emma denies it, especially to herself.

"May I still wait here?"

"We'll stay." David tells them.

She feels Ruby's squeeze the hand she's still holding. "I'll be right here."

Regina stands, letting Henry sit in her place, immediately wrapped in Ruby's protective hug and warm body.

"I have to tell you," Whale stands in her way blocking her view into the somewhat familiar glass walled ICU room Emma is in, "she's… Regina, she wasn't just stabbed."

He extends an arm to her. He wants to comfort her she realizes. Absolutely not._ 'Brace yourself'_, she straightens. The blow is coming.

"Whoever did this also punched her and kicked her." He's tensing. He's scared and she likes it. "She's tumefied. It'll heal, but it's nothing pretty to look at."

She says nothing. There is nothing to say. She wants to hurt. She wants to kill. She wants to take it all away from Emma and inflict it to herself.

"Regina?" He's looking at her like she's zoned out. Maybe she has. "You need to be prepared. Emma-"

"I've heard you, Viktor."

"Very well." He turns to leave. "Call me when she wakes up. We'll check on her every half-hour."

She walks the last few steps to the glass sliding doors. The penumbra is thick, but Emma is bathed in a dim light between the machines she's hooked too and a soft lighting lamp above the bed.

She's grateful Emma is asleep, Henry is with Ruby, Snow didn't follow her. "Oh god, my darling." Her knees go weak. She leans on the glass panel, her forehead to the cold. It helps.

She swallows the bile that raised to her throat. She swallows the fear. The rage.

She inhales resolves and walks in the room. She's Regina Mills. Emma needs her.

Emma looks long but small in the hospital bed. She studies her feet first. She extends a shaky hand, her fingertips on the arch atop her foot slowly following up the rangy shape of her lover. The blanket on her is quite thin, Regina can feel the bandages as she grazes all the way up to Emma's hip. There's a finger clip on her left index finger, the cable goes to a first machine, a sensor monitoring the oxygen in her blood. There are small scratches on the hand, bruises are starting to bloom on the wrist and forearm. A catheter is inserted in the bulging vein on top her hand, distorting her skin. The perfusions dripping medicines and saline, there is also a morphine pump attached to the pole, locked into a plexiglass box. She knows Emma has broken ribs, she's bandaged from her abdomen to her chest. It's not as tight as it would be if she only had broken ribs though. She can tell of three bulges, one is low to Emma's right side, another one is slightly above, and the third one is higher, more centered, close to her diaphragm. A perforated kidney, a collapsed lung. Any other place, any other world, anyone else, Emma would be dead.

Her right arm is elevated on a pillow. It should be on her body with a strap, but in Emma's case, that isn't possible. Her thumb is free before the second knuckle, but Regina can only make the index and pinky fingertips, emerging out of foam and gauze. Her hand is molded in a hand-shaped resin looking cast, it takes each finger, the palm and top of Emma's hand, and then her wrist, all the way up her forearm, close to her elbow. The middle and ring finger have metal splint curved to their shape from knuckle to palm all the way along, bent. The cast is strange. That is until Regina realizes, it's a removable cast, resin, memory foam and gauze. They need access to clean Emma's hand wounds. Her own scars ache at the idea that Emma might have open hand fractures. She'll have to ask. She'll have to ask how her hand is going to recover because this is probably the most compromised part of her in all this mess of injuries.

She shakes herself to be courageous, and looks up at her face. She's crying. She's been all along, but Emma's hand tore a sob out of her. Regina grits her teeth. She must be strong. Her fingers reach her heart, piercing pain again, arm wrapping around herself. Gutted.

Emma's face is altogether swollen, red and purple. There is strip covering stitches at her right eyebrow, more strip on the bridge of her nose, her left cheek her jawline and chin. Both eyes are swollen, both lips blooded at the left corner of her mouth. A tube of clear plastic slightly inserted in her bruised nostrils, for oxygen. Flakes of torn skin, with dots of red are flory on all her face. Glass shards. It explains all the scratches on her body; she fell on glass, on asphalt, where she was kicked and punched, more, after being stabbed. And then Emma had probably kept resisting, with all her will and courage. Her goodness. Holding her wounds with her left arm, the scum who had attacked her must have had stepped on her right hand, maybe to force her handgun out of it.

She will kill that man. That monster. She says it aloud in her mind. She knows she won't. Not in cold blood. In a pursuit, in a fight, in a fit even, she would. She won't in cold blood, not anymore. That's why she wanted Ruby to handle the assailant for her.

It's weak for an Evil Queen, she smiles bitterly. "The Queen is no more. You have vanquished me." She places a hand to her mouth, she needs that quivering lip to stop. Bringing the chair next to the bed as close as she can helps her find countenance.

Delicately, she intertwines her fingers with Emma's left ones. She's careful not to touch any sores. Her own right hand is clutching at her chest. At the ache that doesn't go. Even if she's looking at Emma, breathing.

She strokes ever so gently the soft but pale patches of skins still intact on Emma's hand and arm. "Emma…"

Regina's forehead comes to rest into her arm on the bed by Emma's hand. She watches the slow rise of her chest, listening to the harsh hum of the machine monitoring her heart. Her strong, beautiful heart.

Hers aches. She breathes in and out, calmly. Her eyes close overwhelmed by the tiredness that washes over her. It must be late in the night by now, not that she cares. It has been so easy to completely lose her bearings, her focus. Her hands have been trembling. She let Ruby give her comfort in public. She hadn't ripped Snow to shreds. Not really.

Had it truly been jealousy in Snow's accusation? Since when Snow's feelings actually matter to her?

Her heart aches. She finds no peace. Only touching Emma apparents itself to a soothing balm on her burning nerves and pierced heart. What is this awareness, this need, this weakness that callously cuts her at the knees? Achilles heel. She wants to claw it out of herself yet she would give it up for nothing in this world or another. Not even death.

"Mi amor."

It's barely a whisper. Just about a breath. Certainty.

She waits with her knowledge nestled inside her chest. She waits tenderly. She waits and thinks to herself that it can't be, but oh, oh how it is. She waits as she shyly caresses the hope that she can, because oh, oh how terribly frightened she is.

The first time a nurse visits the room she's startled. It's so unlike her it's startling in and out of itself. Nothing regal about this. She stands out of the way. She doesn't know that nurse either. How many of these people did she curse that she has no idea of? They all know her, well they know what she looks like at the very least.

"I'm just checking her vitals and her temperature," the nurse explains calmly, she's not scared. That's nice. She's got no time for her to get acclimated and over her apprehensions. She does enough of that when Emma isn't lying almost dead in a hospital bed. "It's important so we make sure she has no complications and she heals well."

Regina nods, and sets her hands in her jeans pockets. The right one closes around Emma's tourmaline. She focuses and weaves the spell in her mind. She uses the gem to transfer energy, healing and pain relieving energy. Her magic drains her, unwaveringly, humming in her bones. She gingerly taps in the seed deeply rooted in her chest. She can help. She can give. There is so much more to her than anger and darkness. Emma knows.

The nurse visits them four more times. Regina remains seated; she holds Emma's hand and only lets it go if the nurse needs her too. She doesn't say a word. She keeps feeding energy to Emma's birthstone enclosed in her fist.

When she feels herself adrift, she places the gem in Emma's hand, closing the fingers on it. She kisses the knuckles, and keeps her unconscious hold on the glowing tourmaline. Maybe she put too much. It's bright. She's tired.

Fingertips are threading almost imperceptibly through the hair on the crown of her head. Gentle knuckles are nudging her forehead.

"Hey…" The voice is cracked, parched.

She awakens with a jump. "Emma." It comes out in a gasps. "You're awake."

"Hmm." Emma mumbles.

Water, she needs water. She finds a bottle of mineral water on the bedside table of Emma's bed. A glass. There's a straw too. She makes quick work of it and presents the straw to Emma's lips.

"Do not try to lift your head, please."

Emma doesn't. She doesn't have it in her.

"I'll call the doctor."

"Regina…" Emma swallows. "Thought I was never gonna see you again."

Regina sits on the chair again. She brings her lips to Emma's knuckles once more. "I am here, now, my darling."

"Yeah." Emma squeezes her hand for a fleeting second. "Couldn't move. Called your name in m'mind."

"You're safe now, Emma." She presses her cheek to her hand. "I heard you."

"Didn' use 911." Their emergency rescue spell. Henry and his code names. Emma chose this one, rolling of her eyes or not.

"It wasn't a spell." It wasn't exactly magic. Well not primarily.

"True love."

"Yes, mi amor, true love." Emma's fingertips find her skin, index clip and all. They find her tears too.

"Comes' handy." There's the smallest of a smile which turns into a whimper.

"Baby, no." She's on her feet, the most feathery light fingertips on Emma's lips. "Shhhh…"

Emma pouts her lips just enough to suggest a kiss. "Don't exert yourself. I am going to press the button to call in Whale now."

"Hmm." Emma hums her agreement.

She presses the calling button. It doesn't take more than twenty seconds for a nurse to show at Emma's room threshold.

"She's awake."

"I'll get the Doctor right away."

Whale arrives almost immediately. He turns the bed head light on a stronger setting, but visibly tries not to make Emma uncomfortable.

"Hello, Emma."

"Hmm." She hums again.

"Do you know where you are."

"Hospital." Emma grumbles.

"Do you remember what happened to you?"

"Got dropped… knife." She's lucid. She remembers. It's horrendous but she feels relieved. It means her brain is working as it should.

"I need you to try and open your eyes for me a little."

"Can't."

"I know it's hard. I need to check your pupils Emma."

Emma manages to slide open her very swollen eyelids. It's a miracle she doesn't have orbital fractures. Tears run down her eyes, as Whales blinds her with a penlight he horizontally trails back and forth to check her brain function.

"Good." He nods at Regina. "I know it hurts, Emma, but you're going to be all right now. You need to rest." He places a another button in her hand. "This is a morphine pump."

"Hmm no." Emma tries to shake her head and winces. "No morph…" She can't finish her sentence. The pain.

"It's ok to use it, Emma. I promise we won't let you on it for too long, but for now, you need to. The machine will help you not take more than what you need." He looks at the nurse this time and she makes a note. Regina is willing to bet it's a note to check on Emma's morphine intakes. Or absence thereof.

"Regina?" He turns to face her from the other side of the bed. "We need Emma to sleep now. The more she sleeps the better it is."

"I am not leaving."

"We'll monitor her."

"No." If he thinks she's leaving he's dreaming. Or Suicidal.

"Regina…" Emma squeezes her hand again. "Henry… go home."

Whale sighs, he's not going to argue. "It's better for her if she sleeps and doesn't exert herself."

She's torn. Leaving Emma seems inconceivable. Having Henry wait in the lounge all night or be without her, outside of his home and bedroom when his mother is gravely injured… it's unfair to him.

"Henry?"

"He's with your parents and the Lucases in the lounge." She doesn't want Emma to be upset about Henry. "He's the bravest, darling."

"Don't let… see me like that."

She takes a deep breath, steadying her emotions once more. She can't cry. Not now. Not yet.

"I won't." She promises.

"Ruby." Emma is… calling?

There is a swift motion of chestnut hair, bare feet and even more lanky body than Emma's.

"Hey Emma." The girl looks at her first, stoically. She looks at Regina then, her eyes are wavering as much as her voice isn't.

"Take'em home, 'kay?"

"Okay." Ruby sets her shoulders. Resolve.

"Keep'em safe. This guy-"

"It's been handled, Em, he's at the station." She steps closer to her by Emma's side. "I'll take care of them both, I promise."

"Oh." Emma exhales a little louder than before. "Oh… good."

"I'm not leaving you." She addresses Emma but she's looking at Ruby.

"Make me sleep," Emma swallows. She's hurting. She's hurting terribly. Regina sits down next to her and holds her hand again. "Be with me… wh… wake up."

She takes the gem back from Emma's hand. She looks around, spotting a tray of Emma's things, and a bag with her bloody clothes by a closet. She finds the leather shoe lace Emma doesn't wear anymore but always keeps on her. She doubles the lace and then loops it twice around the gemstone at different angles, tightening the strings in a solid knot. She walks back over to the bed, under all the present people's gaze.

Cautiously she ties the pendant around Emma's neck, letting the stone rest on the delicate skin under the gown. It shines slightly under the fabric. She can feel the buzz of her magic reaching Emma right away. It covers her like a blanket, permeates her through every pore.

"This will help with the pain, and it'll encourage your healing." Regina smiles softly.

"Mmm… feel you." Emma hums. Her body relaxes instantly.

The ache in her heart recesses just a little.

"Relax yourself, my darling." She strokes Emma's left hand with loving fingertips. She holds it and focuses. She looks Frankenstein in the eye. She knows hers are shining purple amethyst. The power is tenfold. She's not angry, she's determined. She's in love and her magic seems to like it even better than darkness. There is a lot of it to devour.

"You'll be back… wake up." Emma is slurring more and more, exhausted but cradled by Regina's energy.

"Yes, I will." She strokes and caresses. Her right hand swirls as she exhales, "You are safe now, mi amor, sleep."

The tiniest moan escapes Emma's lips. She's asleep.

"Be mindful," she tells him, "She won't wake up on her own and she won't dream. She's in a deep sleep cycle, almost unconscious." Her hand lingers on Emma's. She needs to make sure that she's at peace.

"Did you-"

"No, it's not a curse. It's only a sleeping spell, but I control it. If you need her to wake up, call me, I'll be here instantly."

"And the stone?"

"Don't touch it. It must remain in contact with her skin at all times." She is so tired herself, all she wants is to crawl in bed at Emma's side. "It won't interfere with your treatment."

She loathes the idea of leaving her alone. She tears herself from the side of the bed nonetheless. She gazes on the wounded woman she loves so very much, closes her eyes imprinting it all in the red vastness of her closed eyelids before whipping around and walking away without a glance back for anyone watching her.

She can feel more than hear Ruby walking behind her. It's quickly becoming a habit. In the lounge, Henry is asleep against the broad chest of his grandfather, who also has an arm around her son's grandmother. He's fast asleep. Eugenia Lucas seems to be resting her eyes, but Regina has not a doubt she's very well aware of anything that is going on.

"Regina?" Snow is the first one to break the silence. "How is she?" She sobers up, "How is it?"

"She's asleep and will be until further notice, Whale thinks it best." She steps closer to them, watching Henry's demeanor. He's clutching at David's shirts, covered with a blanket this time. "She's in a lot of pain, but she talked, and she's lucid. There doesn't seem to be any damage to her brain."

Snow nods, tears brimming at the corners of her eyes. They're looking at each other. They try very hard not to do that. Truly look at one another. There's the same yearning in Snow's eyes. The longing in young Snow White, for the love and care of her stepmother. Regina had always known how to soothe and reassure, how to make Snow feel safe and content, for as much as she had loathed the ability. The girl pined for her, doted upon her from the moment they had met. All she has ever been capable of seeing is the price Snow White's love has cost her. The incommensurable price.

She has found her true love. The idea is surreal. She has found her true love in Snow White's daughter. How sweet the irony. She's only ever wanted to shunt Snow, so she doesn't have to be reminded, every time she gazes upon the woman, how much has been taken from her. She gazes upon her now, she won't be able to deny who they are to each other for very long anymore.

Snow stands, facing her. The tears quietly fall down her cheeks. Her entire demeanor begs for comfort. Craves for her comfort. The woman is at arm's length, extending one to her. Fingertips graze her waist. She's transfixed. A hand on her hip, another at the small of her back. Snow's body is against hers, her face in the crook of her neck. She can feel the warm tears on her skin. The embrace is gentle but firm. It's exactly like Snow. It means well.

David's eyes are about ready to bulge out of their sockets. Ruby's head is tilted, maybe the shadow of a smile. An encouragement.

She feels her heart slam against her chest. She had loved this girl once, Emma's mother. "Emma is safe now. She'll heal."

Snow sobs and cry, hard, clinging to her. Regina doesn't believe herself when she commands her arms to enclose her in her embrace. She can't soothe. She can't comfort. She finds, however, that she can protect.

"I won't let anything happen to her."

David nods.

"I'm taking them home." Ruby is in front of him and scoops up Henry effortlessly. He doesn't even stir.

With Charming's hand on her back, Snow reluctantly lets go of Regina.

"Go home. Rest," she tells her, "Emma needs you."

With that, she takes the couple of steps separating her from Ruby and her precious cargo. "Eugenia," she nods her gratefulness as her hands settle on the girl's hips, Henry sandwiched between them. She finds her gaze, purple smoke surrounds them.

Henry's room is dark, and quiet if for the sound of his clocks and the soft light of a partial moon. Ruby, to her credit, is quite tolerant to her _'disapparating' _as Henry calls it _'Like in Harry Potter, Mom'_.

She pulls Henry's cover back and he's deposited on his mattress. She makes quick work of his shoes and clothes before covering him up to his chin. She sits by his side, brushing his hair gently. He's peaceful in his sleep, he always has been, once he manages to fall asleep that is.

Unsurprisingly, it's when she's decided to stand and let him rest that he calls for her, "Mom?"

"Shh, my Little Prince," she kisses his forehead, "sleep now."

"I want to see Ma."

"I know sweetheart, and you will, but for now, she's sleeping so she can get stronger, and so should you." She smiles at him, his eyes are drifting back to sleep already. "I love you, Henry."

"... love you too, Mom."

She stands from his bed and finds Ruby leaning against the frame of his bedroom door. She studies the girl for a moment. She wants her to stay. She approaches her, soft hazel eyes are sad and worried. She takes her hand in hers and leads them out of Henry's room around the large landing and mezzanine atop the mansion's staircase. She dismisses the idea of them sleeping in a guest room. Her own bed is where she wants to spend the night.

She guides Ruby to her bedroom.

"I'll take the couch."

Regina doesn't stop at the entrance of her bedroom. She walks them to her side of the bed and switches the dim light there. She pulls up Ruby's sweater, with the shirt she borrowed earlier, over her head. She isn't wearing a bra. The capris yoga pants, she slides down the girls hips and legs, with her skin fitting underwear.

She unbuttons her shirt swiftly, throwing it to the meridian chaise. Her jeans, underwear and bra follow.

She doesn't understand the urgency.

"Regina-"

She interrupts the girl with a kiss. It's a bit desperate; she still doesn't understand what is happening to her. She touches, pushes and pulls, but the girl doesn't budge.

"Regina, enough." Ruby's arms trap hers along her sides, "Enough." The girl kisses the corner of her mouth, her jaw line.

"I…" Regina's having a hard time breathing. She feels the ache in her heart ram at her chest again. "I need…" She wants to tell herself that she doesn't know what she needs.

"I know what you need." Ruby kisses her upper lip. "It's okay." She pulls her bottom lip between hers. "I know what you need." The iron clad around her upper body relaxes. Ruby is caressing her sides, her back, kneading her ass.

She moans and shivers. She closes her eyes. She feels herself swaying, rocking, maybe falling.

"Put your arms around my neck." She wonders why they're not just lying down. Ruby is kissing her throat and it feels so good she lets her head lull loose. The girl helps her lift her arms to the nape of her neck. She caresses it enjoying the warmth of their hips kissing. Ruby smells of her, and Red too. "I'm going to give you what you need."

The girl's right hand caresses her from her ass to her abdomen. She feels her fingers intent on her pubic bone, pressing, exploring. She moans again, "Mmm… Ruby."

"I know… I know, my Queen. I won't make you wait, I promise." She feels lips and tongue kissing, nibbling, sucking. Fingertips part her and dip into her wetness.

"Oh." She breathes it onto the girl's cheek.

"You're so wet." Ruby kisses her, again and again, adoring kisses before her tongue slowly but intently claims her.

The girl nuzzles her face softly, tenderly. Her fingertips are tracing her, rubbing, spreading. She opens her eyes to find Ruby gazing at her lovingly. The girl kisses her forehead once, then her eyes never leave hers. She's breathing heavily. She's ready.

Ruby enters her, slowly, deeply. Three fingers filling her, stretching her. "Mmm..." She whines it, biting her bottom lip and then gasping at how hard she's already clenching her fingers inside her. The girl's tongue soothes over where she's broken the skin of her lip over again and then suckles on it gently. Ruby likes the taste of her blood, Regina sees it in her eyes as she bucks on her hand, taut arm thrusting her fingers at a steady rhythm. It's wild, and she can't hold it at all. She's going to come.

She rides her fingers, she holds on. She looks into her eyes She wants to touch the girl but she can barely stand.

"It's okay." The girl tugs at her lips one time more. "You're going to come for me."

"Y… yes." She's clenching and trembling. Ruby is stroking her clitoris.

She's looking into Ruby's darkened eyes, lustful, love full. She's going to come. She could hide, but she's getting lost into her eyes, running free with Red.

She's whimpering and writhing, crying out little sobs into Ruby's mouth. "Shh…" The girl's cooes, "It's okay, you're okay." Her left arm makes her arch deeper onto her fingers. "She's okay." She clenches frantically.

"Say her name." Ruby whispers it against her lips. They both know what she needs.

"Emma." She exhales it.

She comes shaking, panting, all over and past Ruby's hand, drenching her own thighs.

She falters but Ruby keeps her steadily into her embrace. A warm and wet hand spreads at her back. The girl breathes heavily into the crook of her shoulder. "You should sleep."

Ruby is bracing herself to leave. "Do you need to run?"

"I… no." The girl sounds conflicted. "It's Emma's bed."

Regina gently pushes Ruby back to make her sit on her side of the bed. She stands between the girl's spread legs. She threads both her hands through long strands of chestnut hair. "It's my bed too, Ruby."

Ruby studies her for a long moment. She nods.

Regina climbs on her bed, nudging for Ruby to lie down with her. She finds Emma's pillow and switches it for herself.

She settles on her side to watch her girl. Ruby is lying on her back, tense, a knee up. She uses her fingertips to caress the smooth and fiery skin. Goosebumps raise where she touches.

She would tease the girl, and enjoy playful lovemaking endlessly any other day, but for now, she craves the touch of her protective wolf. She craves Emma's arms. She craves the sun in Emma's hair and the ocean in her eyes. She fears the ache in her heart that she doesn't quite understand. The vastness of the love she now knows to be indestructible.

She feels the exhaustion wash over her in waves, it prickles at her nerves. She rests her head to Ruby's shoulder and her left hand to her right breast, letting it fill her hand. She lifts her head to her left breast and takes the nipple in her mouth.

She's rewarded with a loud moan when she bites it just a tad. Sharp intakes of breath fill her ears when she trails her fingers down Ruby's chest and stomach.

"You don't have to." Ruby's hand halt hers. "You're exhausted."

She is. Maybe in shock too. Which she really doesn't want to dwell upon. "I am tired."

She settles her hand on her abdomen. "Spread you legs for me." She looks at Ruby, her chin resting on the girl's shoulder.

Ruby spreads her legs.

"I want you to." She kisses her lips delicately. "For me."

Ruby's hand glides down herself, Regina's on top of it. She wants to feel.

The girl is soaked in sticky thick wetness. She spreads it massaging her own folds, following the edges of her entrance, much like she had done her. The girl blushes profusely.

"Tell me." She demands it with that voice that makes Ruby's hand twitch and her cunt flex in anticipation.

"I won't… last."

Regina chuckles. It's strange. She's been so terribly scared, so terribly worried and weary all night, all day really. She's starting to relax, here and now, in bed with her lover while her true love lies deeply asleep in a hospital bed. Oddly it's not weighing her down. Maybe she should be more disturbed than she is showing. Maybe she should have sent Ruby away after thanking her for her support.

For now all she wants is to feel. Not anger, not revenge, not numbness. She knows how vulnerable she is. Everything is ablaze. Her heart has awakened to a new dimension of herself she has been refusing to acknowledge for many, too many years. She's almost tempted to pull it out so close she feels she is to exploding.

"Will you come when I command you?"

The girl is intrigued. "Yes." Ruby tells her the truth. Always.

"Show me." She demands it as she rests her head on the soft skin of her chest. Fingers weaves through her hair.

The girl entwines their fingers between her thighs and penetrates herself with both their middle fingers. She's pushed in slowly, and not too deeply. The girl breathes in sharply. She feels their fingers curl and thrust gently, in and out teasing Ruby's entrance. The heel of her hand is rocked onto her clitoris, like the surf.

"You are beautiful." Her voice is warm. "You should know." She seals her words with a kiss to Ruby's chest echoing of her thundering heart.

"Regina…" Ruby's hips rocks with their hand and her back arches.

"Come for me, my beautiful, beautiful girl." she trails kisses to Ruby's throat, her chin, her lips.

She swallows the girl's orgasm with her tongue in her mouth, a hand clutching at her hair like the girl's walls clenching at their fingers together inside her. Ruby's release is warm in the palm of her hand. She lets her ride her orgasm, before gently pulling them out. She brings their fingers together to her mouth, tasting Ruby for the first time.

She hums in the girl's ear, "You taste like the forest. Like the call of the wild under the moonlight."

Ruby is still panting, but she smiles. "Should I howl for you, my Queen?"

"Yes, from now on, you should. I command it."

Ruby turns to her side, facing her. The girl gathers her in her arms, which seems effortless for her. She kisses her once, softly. "Thank you."

Regina rolls her eyes.

"Your Majesty enjoys lording me around."

"I do." They're playing, but amusement is not what they are entertaining.

"I am not the Queen's fool." Ruby's softens her anxious words by stroking the back of her hand in her palm.

"You have your Queen's favor." Regina links their fingers together.

Ruby brings their weaved hands to Regina's chest, resting it on her heart. "Emma is your true love."

"She is." Her heart skips a bit. "Against all odds" Ruby didn't ask a question. Yet.

"There is a bond between us, Regina. I am not fully aware of what it entails exactly, but I know now that I have acknowledged it, I can never turn from you."

The girl, her girl, looks solemn, a champion of honor and loyalty, pledging naked in her sheets, with a hand on her dark mangled heart. She feels the sting of the salt in her tears too late to ever prevent them.

"I don't want you to feel compelled to bind yourself to me because my wolf and I we feel drawn to you and it is sealed in our magic."

"Ruby-" Honorable, stupid and brave. She must have a special pheromone.

"Is there room for me in your heart?" Ruby looks at her the, full of hope and determination. "Emma seems to think that there is." The girl softly wipes her few but heavy silent tears.

She wonders how much more these two have shared and decided for all their lives. "I thought my teaching you to find your own control and taking you to my bed were proof enough that you hold a cherished place in my heart, as charred as it is."

The girl has the decency to look sheepish.

"I'm never going to come in between you and Emma, and your heart-"

"No, you are not. I wouldn't permit it." Ruby's features hardens with the need to defend herself, no doubt. "I know you wouldn't." She softens her voice and a small smile returns to Ruby's obscured face. "Nor will you ever feel the desire to. You have your own place in my heart, Red. One you needn't share with anyone else."

It's the first time she calls the girl by her name. Her birth name. The one which is her and the wolf, Ruby and the girl, all of her. Whole.

"You will see me again." It's not a question, again, but a pleasure the girl is voicing.

"I might, if you behave." She's given an intense and passionate kiss, moans and tongues and fervent lips. One that leaves them both breathing a little harder than before.

"Your wish is my command, my Queen."

"Very well, I command you to rest at your Queen's side." She kisses the silly mutt's nose and turns around her back to the girl, engulfing her face into Emma's pillow and taking the longest inhale of her scent.

She sighs, suddenly missing Emma more than she has words to say. She's not sure she remembers well how to sleep peacefully without her anymore.

"She'll get better. She'll be home soon."

She's exhausted and stressed, but Emma is safe, she will heal. She's Emma's true love. She has a wolf.

Her eyes fall on the shoes she has left earlier by the entrance of their walking closet.

Strong but gentle arms tighten around her waist and chest, molding the girl to her in their embrace. She breathes in deeply, relaxing into Ruby's warm body. She lets her eyelids flutter shut.

More than Emma, the girl is a contrast of confidence and self-doubt. She's a powerful being, with a rare and intense magic. Ruby is lethal, beautiful, and kind. It's an odd combination, mostly for the girl herself. It's also why Regina loves her.

A beast trapped in her breast. She chose red stilettos today.

* * *

**A/N**:

This piece is titled Victory for the one word prompt given to me on tumblr. about four months ago. I think I rewrote this about 8 times, left it on hiatus for at least a month, and agonized over it for endless nights.

I can't begin to tell you the relief of finally pressing that final dot. Even knowing the editing to come.

Speaking of which, I will warmly thank authors LZClotho, Alinaandalion, Fangirlinit, and also Shady kat of Tumblr. for their reading/editing/confidence boosting on this piece.

It was of the utmost importance to me to portray the interactions between Regina & Emma, and Regina & Ruby in a healthy, positive manner. I had to set on a quest, for motivations, for thought processes, for raw reactions and deep emotions. I had to look at things I had not really wondered about before, and Regina… talk about a rollercoaster ride.

It's different, but not my first time at allowing myself to delve in the unconventional, I actually enjoy it fondly. Norms should always be stretched and expanded.

Regina Mills should be adored, wanted, treasured and loved. Above all loved.

Thank you for taking the time to read.

Oh and you can find me on Tumblr. paradoxalpoised & Twitter paradoxalpoised.

###

For you, Lola. Or not.

I know it's your prompt, and I really wanted to make you proud, but I think I can't dedicate this one to you. It's too controversial a plot for a one word prompt you had no idea what I was going to do with. It took me months to figure out why I had to write this piece.

I worked very hard, I did think about giving it my best effort because you deserve no less, but I can do that elsewhere.

You can have my Big Bang story, because I wouldn't have taken on the task without you.

Raincheck, with my apologies.

C.


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